My Atheism

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You worship 1 god that is 3 gods; not as water has 3 states, because your god is Father, Son and Ghost simultaneously. And you offer me a choice of 2 gods, that may be 3.

The first is a god that is love, compassion, benevolence, beneficence, understanding ─ this god is my reward, if I believe, worship, sacrifice, abstain all just right, as you proscribe.

The second god is vengeful, ireful, capricious, vindictive, ego driven ─ this god is my punishment for not believing, worshiping, sacrificing, abstaining all just right, as you proscribe.

If the second god is the God, then god is a tyrant undeserving of worship. If those 2 gods are truly 1 god, then your one god is a schizophrenic tyrant, undeserving of even a passing thought.

If the first god is the God and there is truly one god, and I am a product of her creation, an integral piece within her ineffable plan, then we have issue.

I have to question why you're attempting to alter my thoughts, my beliefs by converting me to your ways. There are so many of you, with so many differing practices and beliefs. Which alone gives me pause to doubt, at the very least, that you're worshiping the right god in the right way. Which in turn inspires doubt that there is a god. I suppose the difference is, you focus on the commonalities, but I would suggest, that only makes god and religion banal concepts.

I have to wonder, too, if there is a god, of whose plan we are all part, why you see fit to tinker in it. A mortal, a sinful creature of limited capacity. Can you really know god's will? You shrug pain and suffering off as unfortunately necessary but ultimately mysterious parts of the plan, while claiming that you know the plan well enough to know that I need to believe and behave as you do, because it is in the plan for me to do so, altho I may have freewill in the matter and my atheism may, in fact, be part of the plan.

I think, the god I could believe in, would care more about my character ─ that I am fair, just, rational, skeptical, compassionate, actively living, pursuing some purpose, experiencing the marvels of creation, and enjoying this life and this world which was created for us, than that I worship the correct way or even that I simply believe.

This is an essential fact, I believe you've missed: appreciating and embracing life celebrates your god's creation and thereby your god, more than the platitudes of prayer or prostrations of faith.

As to hell and heaven. If hell exists, the schizophrenic-tyrant god is the God and I would prefer the freedom of hell. If the god of love and compassionate-understanding is the God, I will have my place in heaven, because I will have lived a good and just life, I will have been marveled and humbled by all that exists and all that I have experienced. God being omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent would know the truth of my soul and being a god of love and compassionate-understanding, could not deny me entry for my atheism. This last god then, is not your god, but a product of my mind.

We end with the truth. I am an atheist. I am content with naturalistic explanations for existence, while my morality is defined by beneficence, liberty and equality. I have read your bible; I could defend my atheism from scripture. I could defend my atheism from scientific literature. I do not write in order to dismiss you or your belief, but share my perspective and hopefully foster understanding.